I hate life. My body. my face. im dumb. im never going to go anywhere in life. i hate this. i dont know how much longer i can do this. i dont like living. i dont know why im here. i dont know why i hate myself. i just know i do. more than anything. i feel like im never going to be skinny. im never going to be attractive. im never.. never going to not hate myself. its always been like this.. always. i know im ready to die. i know im ready to not have to worry about being accepted into society because i will be in Heaven. i wish i could be some happy teenager like all the others in my town. i try, i really do. but it doesn’t work. I love my family, my friends, and i absolutely love my boyfriend so why cant i love myself?

I asked this black girl what her first impression of me was, and her answer was “I thought you were some psycho path. You wouldn’t eat and you were going anarexic.”

I hate the fact that im alive.

I got on here thinking I was going to vent about how much I hate the house I live in and the people in it, until I read the message my boyfriend sent me for when I am sad. :)